Comedian Nik Rabinowitz shares his travel memories and tips.
First holiday memory?
My first memory of a long journey was a trip to Sea Point from Constantia when I was about 5 to see my Great Aunt Sarah. My mom packed me a little suitcase full of matchbox cars, my parents loaded the car full of supplies and padkos and off we went. It was an exciting journey and I remember fondly the look on my aunt’s face as we arrived in her driveway. (Footnote: Now I take my own children on trips to Sea Point a few times a year and I hope they enjoy it as much as I did as a small boy.)
Favourite place to travel to in South Africa?
My favourite place is the Agter Pakhuis, near Clanwilliam. As a kid we’d camp on a farm called Boontjieskloof (now gentrified to Bushmanskloof), where’d we’d sleep in caves, hunt for rock art, and commune with the baboons. It’s still my favourite place. And the Transkei. It’s mystical and has a wall with a hole in it. My travels to Joburg are also very exciting, they tap into the adrenalin junkie buried deep within my psyche and bring him out into the light for all to see.
Best holiday?
A few years ago we took a surf trip to Bali with two friends, my wife and our oldest son, Ben. Ben’s eyelashes were a hit with Japanese tourists: “Look, EyeSlash, EyeSlash!”
The Balinese are awesome with kids, they take them off your hands whenever possible. Also they speak an amazing English, which includes mixing up Ps and Fs.
For example, a waiter asked: “Would you like chicken or fork?”
“We’re Jewish,” I replied, “so we’ll have the chicken. We’ll go upstairs for the fork later. Terima kassie.”
What have you learnt from your travels?
That if you’re travelling anywhere in Africa, you should travel with a shovel for a variety of reasons, such as digging your own long drop, fending off attackers and possibly burying an iguana you found along the way and kept as your beloved pet, but that you may have accidentally forgotten to feed.
Ideal travelling companion?
See question 4 for my first option – pet iguana. Although I never owned one. I once fostered a goat, Stoffel. He made a good travel companion. People regularly mistook him for a dog. But he and my wife didn’t get on well after he peed on her pillow.
My ideal travel companion is my wife, Debbie. She is an extraordinary woman. Beautiful, smart, loving, compassionate, funny. I’d go anywhere with her. Also she’s a GP, so I can get a doctor’s note whenever I want. Pity I don’t have a real job.
Beach bum, a culture vulture or an adrenalin junkie?
I save my bum for the beaches at home. When travelling I can be described as more of a mountain climber or bagel eater or accidental buyer of overpriced scarves, or cross-town cyclist.
Greatest travel luxury?
A suitcase with wheels. Frostbite defrosting cream. A shovel (see answer above).
Holiday reading?
Reading is an integral part of my workday so the question, as phrased, is something of an oxymoron. However, my friends and family like buying me the autobiographies of wildly successful comedians. Many of which I have read and enjoyed. Recent reads include Tina Fey (Bossypants), David Walliams (Camp David), Amy Poehler (Yes Please?).
Where has seduced you?
Many come to mind… Great Zimbabwe, Kenya’s Lamu Island, Zambia’s Luangwa Valley. One that stands out is a small bombed-out pump house on the banks of a river in the middle of nowhere, on the border between Mozambique and Swaziland. My boss at the time decided we’d set up camp there, build a few beds, put up some shelves, and dig a long drop. Good times!
Worst travel experience?
Mozambican malaria. Botswanan heartbreak. Zimbabwe police interrogation.
Best hotel?
Last year I stayed at The Drake in Toronto. They have all sorts of cool stuff, like a theatre, and real life hipsters, and a bedside book, which at first glance looks like a Bible, but then you read the title which is “God is very disappointed in you”.
Favourite walk, swim, ride or drive?
At home I love to traverse the hiking grounds of the Cape, surf the shark-infested waters of Muizenberg, and take the odd dip at Dalebrook. However, you can’t beat the Mediterranean for a swim, the water is warm like a pool that’s been pissed in by 100 children and the waves are big enough to enjoy, but calm enough to take your mind off the raging Mediterranean people awaiting you beyond the shoreline.
I enjoyed riding a bicycle in the blazing Los Angeles sun, 40km across town to my friend’s house because he said there would be too much traffic to come and fetch me. My friend, who I hadn’t seen in 15 years. My friend. I showed him.
Best meal abroad?
I ate a salmon bagel in New York at a place called Russ & Daughters that blew my hair back. And if by best you also mean worst, I nearly ate a dish in Peru commonly known as guinea pig. I say nearly, as my Rabbi may end up reading this.
Favourite city?
Cape Town. For why, you can just refer to any one of the hundreds of articles that explain why Cape Town is the best city in the world. Mind you, it’s likely that my personal reasons for loving it won’t be there, for example, Perrewaentjies; shark spotters; and that particular hue of orangey brown that the affluent housewives of Sea Point and Clifton become after about 3 decades of sun exposure. Also, Helen Zille directing traffic.
Where to next?
Los Angeles, city of angels and ex-South African Jews.
Weekend Argus