By Dr Vusi Shongwe
My gut reaction when I heard of the untimely and tragic death of Prince Mbongiseni Milton Muntukaphiwana Zulu was as though I had become oblivious to the fact that we will all die, despite my reckoning that it come too soon.
The sentiments expressed in this regard are no exception as they sum up the feelings of many across the globe. Alice Woolley wrote, “Part of life is our resolute inability to imagine the passing of those we love.”
Indeed, our loss is immeasurable, but we take comfort in knowing that Prince Mbongiseni has left a legacy worth emulating. Indeed, death is not only a poignant reminder of the relentless passage of time but also an opportunity that the same life accords us to leave a legacy that will transcend our sojourn in this world.
It is also a shocking reminder of the fact that things and friendships last but, as the writer Raymond Carver once said, only up to a point. That point is that the prince’s death has hit close to the royal family.
In one of his letters, DH Lawrence, the famous poet, wrote, “The dead do not die. They look on and help.” A familiar toast to the departed is also worth tossing in, “To live in the hearts and minds of those left behind is not to die.” And on a more personal final note, I would endorse the spirit of another line of poetry, this from May Swenson, “Do not mourn the beloved. Try to be like him.”
With the passing of Prince Mbongiseni, I sing, not a dirge, but a paean, knowing that my unwelcome tears are not for him but for myself. It might seem unquestionably superfluous to add to the avalanche of glowing tributes of many people on the prince. However, in marking his recent death I may also take this opportunity to add a few memories of the humble son of the soil. With his passing, the Zulu royal family is poorer without him.
If a person dies, his or her family is necessarily and inescapably distressed. But if we are to take our faith to heart, our dear departed does not really go far.
To His Majesty King Misuzulu kaZwelithini, and his Prime Minister and the Zulu nation, His Excellency Prince of KwaPhindangene, the loss is visceral, like a punch in the gut.
Prince Mbongiseni Muntukaphiwana Milton Zulu: The man known for his humbleness, humour, and humility
It is hard to describe a humble man like Prince Mbongiseni in a few paragraphs. It is also equally hard to find the right word to capture the essence of a leader that Prince Mbongiseni was. I have thought long and hard, and the best words that I could retrieve from my limited facility of expressions are the triple “H” humility, humbleness, and humour.
It is humility, humbleness and humour that have characterised the life of Prince Mbongiseni. This explains why he shall always remain in the hearts of those he left behind.
The standard word of comfort when someone has died is that they will live on through the individuals that knew and loved them. However, in the case of Prince Mbongiseni, his loss is beyond those who knew him personally. But the loss is clear: there will never be another like him. In sharing our cherished recollections of him, we assuage our sense of loss. John Stone, a physician poet, once wrote that: “I’ve seen death come on as slow as rust, or as quickly and unexpected as a doorknob coming loose in your hand.” Given the untimely passing of our dear prince, this quote sticks in my head as I think about Prince Mbongiseni Zulu.
It is a curiosity, and can seem a paradox, that when a precious person becomes hid in death’s dateless night, we may drown an eye (the poignant phrases are Shakespeare’s) at the individual loss, but so soon as we try to make account of it we resort directly to general themes and elevated abstractions of which his death is just one instance. In a literate civilisation this means going back to the familiar stays of textual tradition, always under the lugubrious rubric of mortality yet still for the comfort and resignation they may proffer. Thus, after the death of Prince Mbongiseni Zulu, and as a first of thanksgiving, we can gladly reflect with Sir Thomas Browne, “Tho we could not have his Life, yet we missed not our desires in his soft departure”. Already the gentle exactitude of the words makes for solace, as for harmonious recognition of the mercy that attended his earthly and tragic termination.
The ground has slipped away under our feet, and we are trying, somehow, to sit in this empty space that has been left behind. For everything that he did, if we have forgotten to show our gratitude enough, we are thanking him now. We love him still; though he is gone, he will be remembered for ever. We pray to God that he rests in peace, that he prays for us, because we here down below will him very much. To the angels of heaven that are accompanying him now, we ask that they watch over him, that they guard him well. We will miss him dearly.
It seems impertinent to evaluate, in a short space, the life of Prince Mbongiseni Zulu. I should have spoken while he could still hear and dispute what I have to say. Detailed obituaries have already appeared. The prince would have been overwhelmed yet proud of the tributes paid to him. I wish to give an account of my personal recollections with the prince, especially to remind myself of the things he implanted so deeply in me about the reverence of the Zulu royalty.
The prince oversaw matters of the Royal family with convincing, and with aplomb, eloquence, and great precision. He will be remembered with respect and great affection by many people.
The affable Prince Mbongiseni will be remembered for his laughter, his warmth, his enthusiasm, his loyalty and his integrity. Nobody who met Prince Mbongiseni could remain unmoved by him. He was a rare man, inimitable and irreplaceable. Those of us who were close to him have by now realised, or are beginning to realise, months after his death, that we going to feel the presence of Prince Mbongiseni - shaped void in our lives for ever.
Prince Mbongiseni was a great light. He was a wonderful friend. He was a prince. The prince spreads his light upon the world. He brings optimism and a generosity of spirit. The shock of Prince Mbongiseni’s death comes from his unfailing humility.
A man who was blessed with an exceptional generosity, humility, humour, magnetism, and undaunted zest for life. Prince Mbongiseni will be remembered for his gregarious mien, and his boundless good humour which endeared him to everyone who knew him.
One could not stay close to Prince Mbongiseni without being impressed by his kindness and humour. But most impressive of all was the glimpses of warm-heartedness which were never far away. He was a vital, passionate man; broad of royal knowledge and of smile. To have known his friendship is one of the dearest in the lives of those who interacted with him. Life in many places is better and happier because we shared it with him. His tragic departure from life is a deep and irreparable loss to the Zulu royal family.
Prince Mbongiseni was a charming conversationalist and always a happy person. Though he was quite patient, Prince Mbongiseni found the petty royal politics and pomposity of some members of the Royal family tedious. Certainly, he did immerse himself deeply in matters which remained a shadowy and strange world to him. He could also be intransigent in what he considered matters of principle, and he never dissembled his estimation of others. His sense of humour was acute.
The prince was not an ebullient personality. Rather, he was a quiet, thoughtful, considerate, and unassuming man. He was the type to get privately frustrated angry, and to celebrate his successes with a self-effacing smile. He had also refined the classic administrator's skill of being somewhere else when things were going well but suddenly appearing at just the right moment if things started to go awry. Indeed, in sharing our cherished recollections of the prince, we assuage our sense of loss.
His modesty and courage endeared him to all and sundry. He was a vital, passionate man, and broad of knowledge and of smile. Prince Mbongiseni’s unblinking seriousness and commitment on matters of royalty were outstandingly remarkable. Undoubtedly, one would argue that it is the very seriousness that has led to his tragic death. All who knew him are still struggling to accept the impossibly early loss of such a big person - loved him fiercely.
He was a captivating speaker with a charismatic presence as exemplified he co-directed the Reed dance ceremony.
They say the death of great men mirrors their lives. In this context it is fitting that the prince Mbongiseni’s jovial disposition and humility forever be linked to the Zulu royalty. He was a gentle of gentleman in the true sense of the word. Prince remained an approachable man who I shall always remember especially for his dry humour. He endured many insults hurled at him for standing by the King with great characteristic fortitude and aplomb.
The prince has been someone who had the courage to stick by his convictions and continue with work he had embarked on, however unfashionable - a character that many find admirable. To all of us he was an irreplaceable friend, and an unfailingly honest, and principled person. He was an endlessly interesting and interested man. His substantial legacy is evident. Not so clear is how to fill the gap.
He was gentlemanly in demeanour, with a quiet wit, considerate of others and sensitive to their needs. Those who have worked with him remember him as a kindly, conscientious, and supportive. A courteous and considerate individual who liked to think the best of others. I shall personally miss seeing his amiable face, and as someone who was invariably genial and would always engage in a friendly chat. Indeed, the prince had the gift of great friendship and invested each relationship with his charm, grace, and humour. He was also a no-nonsense person when the situation demanded. However, looking back on more than 25 years of our acquaintance, so vivid was his presence, so strong his grip on this life, and that I can recall whole snatches of conversation.
His loyalty to King Misuzulu has, poignantly, been both courageous and tragic. To some he became a hero, to others an enemy. One does not need to be a rocket scientist to decipher why he has been assassinated. Whatever soreness he may have felt on that account would be mollified by testimonies to his integrity which are already beginning to appear, even to those who gave instructions for his assassination. Prince Mbongiseni's inestimable contribution to the royal poignantly exemplified by his killing is assured of an honoured place in the history of the mighty Zulu nation. The world is an infinitely duller place without him, and he will always occupy a most cherished place in our memories.
Prince Mbongiseni Zulu has inscribed in our memories of him a fond epitaph that remains perturbing and an inspiration. We pray and believe that God will take care of his soul. He will be missed, and fondly remembered.
Personally, I will remember the prince as an enthusiastic and engaged friend. In person, the prince was charming, modest, and full of fun. His quiet disposition hid a steeliness that enabled him to navigate the tempestuous and tidal waves of the Zulu royal family. My thanks to him, and my fondest memories of him.
Indeed, being in Prince Mbongiseni’s presence was both magical and wondrous. The Great Ones radiate warmth and a sense of peace and self-assuredness as they move through the world, leaving their mark in a profoundly unique way. The legacy Prince Mbongeni leaves us all is inspiring and empowering.
There may have been another side of the kind-hearted and ever-smiling Prince Mbongiseni, but I saw only the one I have described. In all my dealings with Prince Mbongiseni, I consistently found him to be a quite exceptional and beautiful human being. Nor have I ever heard of anyone who knew him at all well who did not share my high regard. Prince Mbongiseni is remembered with great gratitude and affection. Indeed, his open, friendly character and charisma will be remembered with great appreciation and affection.
His premature and tragic death is a bewildering and uncompromisingly final event which fits so poorly with the kind of person and the life with which we were familiar. Many of us will choose to remember him for his quirky sense of humour, his understated ability to inspire those around him, and for his warmth and unstinting generosity. Most of all, we shall remember and miss him as a very dear friend. May his soul rest in perfect peace. Ndabezitha! Mageba! Wena weSilo! Lal'uphumule!
*Shongwe is the director of KwaZulu-Natal Sports, Arts and Culture
SUNDAY TRIBUNE