This Women's Day, IOL is celebrating Women who are Changing the World, in big ways and small. But we know it's not always easy to stay on course or to even get started so we turned to Hani (Ying Han) Cheng, a bestselling author and life and business innovation coach, for advice. Here's what Hani had to say:
Being a woman leader and changing the world is not easy. Along with showing up everyday for your community, team, colleagues, family and loved ones, your responsibility also lies in showing up for your (lekker) self.
How many times have we felt stuck, on the brink of burning out, stressed and pressured with no time to heal and recover? How many times have we made sad excuses, ignoring our needs and put everything else before us?
In the 15 years that I’ve worked with successful women change makers of all colour, ages, demographic, and nationalities – one thing is for sure: Women are givers. No matter how much you try to deny that.
Despite a slew of self-help new age wellness options – yoga, meditation, or therapy, one can still feel depleted, secretly not “in flow” and most of all… disconnected.
Disconnected from the original world-changing positive impact that you’ve been working towards, despite all the external validation. Disconnected to a full sense of aliveness and energy – that makes you smile, vibrate and magnetize… freely! Disconnected to your sense of true freedom – from the passion and fire that one filled your veins.
Where is it now? When has it last been fed?
Last month, I took my first ever trip to Cape Town and met amazing women change makers of all levels – each with a fire within them ready to rock!
They were vibrantly brave, full of community and heart, enough inspiration and energy to move mountains!
I fell in love.
Yet, when I asked what stopped each one of them for being their FULL YUMMY selves, the results were “sad”.
Here are the 9 top issues that our survey data from Cape Town shows that women leaders face while changing the world.
1. Constricting Your TRUE YUMMY Vision
Failure to match your true vision with your strengths and aliveness causes unhappiness, lack of effectiveness, motivation, energy, confusion in identity, lack of authenticity and drive.
If you’re feeling stuck of low energy – you aren’t on the right track.
What is the right track and what IS your yummy vision? 80% of the attendees at my Cape Town events said that they are somewhat on the right path yet not entirely in the right direction.
When you are on your YUMMY purpose, you are lit up, fired up, turned on and there is no denying you are attracting support to execute this vision fully. You feel happy, excited, energized and refreshed to take on the mission. You feel clear, directed and motivated to move forth with power and strength.
If you are already feeling this – amazing – make sure you stay on momentum!! And, I challenge you to dream bigger.
Find out how to realign with your EVOLVED Yummy Vision:
2. Failure to Manage Fear Yummily
Oh fear, anxiety, stuckness and denial… 70% of you are stopped by this to dream bigger, staying in your “comfort” zones. 30% of you experience this on a severe level – causing panic and emotional breakdowns.
Are your actions that you are taking aligned with what you truly (yummily) want? Are the actions you are taking driven by fear or inspiration?
Are you living your Yummy Vision now?
We have so many meditations on our YUMMY channel to help you through every specific fear you may have. We have a whole chapter in
our bestselling book (Yummy Action) dedicated to just this topic.
Hop on over and get the YUMMY framework for focused action here: www.yoloabundance.com/freepdf
3. Lack of True Yummy Focus
Too many ideas, stuck in a hamster wheel of never-ending busyness, feeling distracted with a lack of focus on a bigger mission, feeling like
time is slipping through your fingers?
This constitutes about 80% of the contributing stress factors in our survey of Cape Town women. That’s a lot!
How are we able to channel all our yumminess to one direction when we’re bombarded by all the daily drama, tasks, to-dos and demands from every single direction?
How can you stay TRUE to your vision and not get side tracked by personal day to day responsibilities?
It is not easy, not at all!
It is not easy to stay focused on your Yummy Vision. Yet, it is the single most important thing you will have to do – to see significant progress.
If your vision is about writing a book, serving a larger community, or creating a completely different career – you need to start now!
If you are already on this path, what is the single action you can take now to move this forward even more?
A paraphrase from our Yummy You Only Live Once Book: When you know what your YOLO commitment is, you know what truly lights you up and how you can shine. When you shine, your people find you. When you put a stake into the ground and commit fully to your YOLO vision – you will let nothing stop you. You will become unstoppable.
Want more on how to cultivate this unstoppability? Click HERE to uncover your YUMMY focus and commitment with a FREE framework.
4. Unconscious Self Sabotage / Lack of Confidence/ Self Doubt/Insecurity
It is no secret that any unwanted emotion, when untreated, can pile on top of each other and eat us up when we least expect it. Negativity can swallow us alive, sending us into a black hole of emotions.
No matter how strong or how successful you are – there will be days where you are weak(er). This is life.
Yet, these deep rooted emotions cannot be ignored, suppressed or cast aside. Doing so will only deny them further. Over time, over decades, they build up even more.
One day, they will explode. This can come in the form of a mental break down, a panic attack, or a big illness that will take you out for years.
1% of my clients come to me already in the worst stages of this – fibromyalgia, chronic diseases, severe anxiety, stress-induced cancer.
It’s easy to ignore if you are young. Most people don’t “fix it until it’s broken.”
50% of the women who attended my workshops in Cape Town indicated that they experience very real negative emotions that dampen their progress. Most keep quiet about it, not wanting to bother anyone. This untreated is unacceptable. And, the treatment is clear.
What is the biggest negative emotion that you feel that stops you from moving forward? How long have you ignored or cast it aside? Are you ready to do something about it – proactively?
Our latest most effective treatment solution includes mind hacking and microcurrents. Work with these concurrently with solid yummy transformation frameworks and you can begin taking care of these deeply rooted habits and patterns.
For more information, email our team with the subject line: microcurrents at team@y-age.net
5. Bad Relationship with Friends and Family
What does your past and relationship have to do with your influence and success? Everything, love, everything!
How you treat one thing indirectly spills into ‘all’ other things! Even unconsciously, when we don’t heal the wounds we’ve had from our past, it creeps into the work that we do in the world.
It tarnishes it a little bit – making it a little harder. It creates unnecessary blocks, stress, and mood swings.
Almost 90% of the 1800 clients who’ve walked through our yummy meditation doors have said that they don’t know if they’ve truly healed
from past hurt or pain.
While the goal isn’t to heal 100% (our goal is not to achieve perfection), progress in healing the past can make a world of a difference.
When you can walk without the emotional burdens of the past, you are lighter. Your footsteps are easier, your mood is calmer, and you are happier.
Want to know which relationship has the biggest impact on your wellbeing? It’s not popular… but it is the truth.
The one with your mother or your father. When you heal that – you heal your relationships, you heal your impact, you heal your capacity to hold MORE value and visions into creating YOUR change.
If you’re ready to face that and heal it even a little bit, I’ve got a meditation for you.
6. Lack of Yummy Communication
You will not believe how many women have breakdowns in communication, stemming from dishonesty, low trust, lack of transparency and lack of teamwork.
Especially with high-level executives, the frustration and inefficiency that arises from the lack of effective Yummy communication takes up
60% of their stress levels – causing energy loss and hostile team environments.
Unfortunately, true and authentic communication is not natural for everyone.
The way we view humanity and the way we treat our teams is largely influenced by past (bad) experiences.
How then can we evaluate how we are doing in terms of yummy communication?
Good Yummy communication leads to stronger team spirit, team morale, efficiencies, ownership among members, and ultimately affect
the whole ship to steer forth with high momentum.
Without optimizing your communication, you will not be able to change the world effectively. You will take five steps forward, and three steps back.
The easiest way to treat this aspect of your Yummy Vision is by auditing your relationship with the key players in your team who are
executing your vision with you.
Asking questions like:
- How much trust is there from each party?
- What’s the biggest challenge with each one of them?
- How can that be better?
- How can you be better?
To go deeper with this, reach out to my team at team@y-age.net and we can send you some more ways to optimize Yummy Communication.
7. Lack of Yummy Body Image
It hurts me every time when beautiful amazing women diminish their curves or self image.
At a women’s networking event in Cape Town I spoke at, a surprising 35% of women still struggle with their body image.
While it is difficult to admit this (we get shamed so much about this!), it is important to face the truth.
From a scale of 1-10, how yummy do you feel in your body?
If your number is anything less than a 7 – let’s change that. No matter how much media tells you to have “self love”, when you aren’t feeling it – there’s nothing that is more fake than to “fake it” till you “make it”.
So, step 1 is to be honest with yourself.
Step 2? Define what it feels like to feel YUMMY in your body.
Ready to enhance your Yumminess? Download our worksheet and use it in the context of your yummy body image here.
8. Lack of Yummy Impact
70% of our Cape Town community care about finding “meaning” in their work and 55% want to be able to contribute even more “impact”.
A few programmers and lawyers I met during my talks at two co-working spaces downtown Cape Town expressed that they worked alongside a lot of men.
Their biggest challenge was having their voices heard and respected and seeing that their actions led to meaningful impact.
Impact is an aspiration that we have the luxury to create today. Our parents may not have had to luxury to even think that.
If you are a woman leader – you KNOW that you being you CAN create lasting positive change to the communities, industries and people
who mean most to you.
Yet, challenges and obstacles are prevalent.
When you have a CLEAR TRUE YUMMY Vision (in point 1), and are able to clear out all the blocks that hold you back (points 2-7), you
will be able to show up even more powerfully to create change from a place of completeness.
This impact you dream of is in reach.
The impact that you already are making has the potential to expand – even more.
Want to experience even more of that? Watch below and go deeper on the 10 secrets on how to create more positive impact in your life now.
9. Lack of Yummy Financial Security
85% of the Cape Town women in our survey desire to be “independent and wealthy” while contributing to others and their families.
A few very successful Capetonian women shared with me that they still feel the need to feel financially supported by their husbands or other reserves, especially when the causes they are leading are non-profit.
Understanding what YOUR definition of Yummy financial security is paramount in creating a sense of freedom and confidence.
Sometimes, it is not about the actual number that matters. In fact, studies show that many never feel “secure” – even if they double or tripled their income.
What does Yummy Financial Security mean to you? What does Yummy Financial Security feel like to you? Financial confidence begins within. The easiest way to begin cultivating that is through this meditation.
Watch below to tune into this Financial Abundance Meditation to experience that for yourself.
So now you have it. Some simple steps that can get you pivoting in the right direction so that you can show up fully alive, free, and YUMMY in your body and your influence.
See you, lekker change maker
Eks baie lief vir jou ;-)
Hani