Dear Prudence,
My husband and I had a baby girl five months ago.
Before she was born, we had a long conversation about breast-feeding versus formula and decided that breast-feeding was best and that I would try to do it for a year.
The problem is that I'm completely miserable. I work full-time and it's really stressful to fit pumping into my schedule. My breasts are constantly sore and I am always exhausted.
Our daughter is beautiful and healthy and I want to do the right thing, but I don't know how much longer I can bear this.
My husband doesn't want me to stop. Every time I mention formula, he gives me all the reasons why breast-feeding is best. He suggests I talk to our doctor or La Leche League. I don't want to pump her full of chemicals or have her immune system suffer, either, but I'm desperate. What can I do? I feel so guilty about all of it.
Running Dry
Dear Running,
Mom, return the pump, toss the lactation bra, and get an economy-size container of formula.
At great personal cost, you have breast-fed your daughter, she has gotten plenty of benefit, and now she would benefit even more from a happy, rested mother.
You are doing no harm to your child by weaning her. Breast-feeding is making you miserable, and that's all your husband needs to know. He has no skin in this game, so don't let him bully you.
You both want what's best for your daughter, and that means switching to formula.
Prudie
* Emily Yoffe is an advice columnist, using the name Prudence. Please send your questions for publication to prudence@slate.com. Questions may be edited.
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