Despite holding out hope of stumbling across a decent - not brilliant, just decent - horror TV series, I’m disappointed once again. Allow me to explain.
When I saw “The Baby”, a British horror comedy, was streaming on Showmax, I thought, “What the heck, let me give it a go.”
How bad could it be, really? Talk about being foolishly optimistic.
Well, let me put it to you this way. It’s akin to that unsatisfying feeling you get when you order your favourite meal only to find that the restaurant has a new chef and it’s no longer the same.
The eight-part series follows 38-year-old Natasha (Michelle De Swarte), who is surrounded by baby-booming and baby-obsessed girlfriends. She’s clearly not a baby person.
Nor does she have a filter when it comes to speaking her mind. As such, her questioning if there is some regret over starting a family or encouragement of another friend to consider the option of abortion, aren’t well-received.
With her head done in by all the baby talk as another friend announces her pregnancy, she decides to go away to clear her head.
Little does she realise that her issue is about to become a bigger problem when a baby, literally, falls into her hands.
Right from the get-go, there’s something ominous about this development. More so, when the cops who tried to rescue the baby from his “mother” who jumps off a cliff, are tragically killed.
This baby seems very attached to Natasha who has the nurturing instincts of a mama eagle: complete detachment.
Although she is principled, motherhood holds little appeal for her and she tries to do the right thing by taking the baby to a nearby law enforcement agency.
But it’s not to be. This baby, while cute, can only be pacified when she’s holding him.
And so Natasha finds herself saddled with this infant, who gives her a very eerie vibe, especially when she notices the gruesome demise of people who get too close. It varies from horrific car crashes to choking to the amputation of fingers.
There’s definitely a menacing Chucky-esque feel about this baby. The gurgle and smiles are merely a smokescreen for an evil disposition.
Natasha’s suspicions of something not being right with the baby are confirmed when someone anonymously drops off a memory stick containing information about the previous “mothers” of this baby. All of them met with an untimely demise.
While Natasha struggles to maintain her sanity, especially with the baby popping up in different parts of the house, Mrs Eaves (Amira Ghazalla) arrives to help.
She’s been following the blood trail for years and has a solution: the baby must be killed.
Natasha disagrees and Mrs Eaves decides to take matters into her own hands.
Here’s the thing about the series that annoyed me the most. It started off promisingly enough. Viewers get the sense that something is amiss and are curious to see how the situation unfolds.
The problem is that the storyline becomes monotonous as Natasha is stuck in this good vs evil loop. And when her estranged younger gay sister Bobbi (Amber Grappy), who is desperately trying to adopt with her partner, attempts to help, the situation takes another turn as she is now forced to confront issues with her mother Barbara (Sinéad Cusack).
There are some scenes in “The Baby” that hark back to the fantasy ones in “American Gods”.
That said, it doesn’t live up to the hype. The writers waste so much time expanding on the curse and history, that the conclusion is rushed and laughable.
Honestly, by episode eight, titled “The Possession”, I felt like streamers were being punked. Surely you don’t build this hair-raising narrative, laden with a curse stemming from abandonment issues, to a conclusion that simple.
This baby has been around for decades and in all that time so much blood has been spilt.
Perhaps, that’s where the comedy aspect comes in. But I think that is just evil to fans of the genre. Don’t waste you time with this one.
“The Baby” is currently streaming on Showmax.